This is your public service announcement that you can keep not settling.
The research is in and it’s showing that the conventional dialogue around fertility – you know, the one that touts the (false) fear that our fertility steadily declines with age and drops of a cliff at the age of 35 – is WRONG, misleading, and unhelpful.
As a holistic fertility specialist and someone who got pregnant on her first try at the age of 36, I want to shout from the rooftops that – ladies, we’re not screwed! We can totally get pregnant easily in our late 30s and into our 40s, so please DON’T settle and DO take the time it takes to find the right partner (if that’s what you want) or grow your career (if that’s what you want) or explore the world and have adventures (if that’s what you want) before having kids (if that’s what you want). DON’T succumb to external pressures out of fear for your fertility. But DO take your health and fertility into your own hands, there’s so much you can do to boost your fertility.
While fertility is shown to decline with age, being a little older doesn't decrease fertility IN AND OF ITSELF. Studies show that our age is not the biggest determining factor in our fertility. It's not the steady march of time that damages our eggs most but rather the qualities of the environment in which our eggs live. Factors like inflammation, oxidative stress, toxins, hormonal imbalance, and poor blood flow can all disrupt intraovarian homoeostasis, adversely affecting our egg quality and overall fertility.
In other words, IT’S NOT AGE THAT HURTS OUR FERTILITY, it's the quality of our health.
This is great news because we can influence and improve these factors!
It frustrates me that all ObGyns say when you tell them you’re going to try to get pregnant is – great, take a prenatal (and they don’t tell you what to look for to find a GOOD prenatal) and call me when you’re pregnant.
Most of us women have been on birth control for years, masking any signs and symptoms of hormonal imbalance, inflammation, stress, and toxins, robbing our bodies of essential nutrients (B6 and folate and good bacteria) and not learning to be in tune with our bodies.
We then go off birth control and want to get pregnant, but so many of us need good guidance about how to get our hormones, inflammation, and micronutrients to optimal levels. We need so much more than just a prenatal, people!
And then only when it takes us more than a (frustrating, emotional roller coaster of a) year to get pregnant do they offer help, but they point us to drugs and heavier intervention that we don’t usually need. We just need to know how to get our bodies and hormones back in balance. I get extremely frustrated about this. Women need to know this information.
We need to know this information and these strategies not only for our fertility, but also for the opportunity it provides for us to optimize our overall health, reverse underlying imbalances, and prevent future health problems.
My Becoming Mama program walks you through the research, strategies and steps to optimizing fertility. I followed the Becoming Mama program four months prior to “trying”, and I think it’s big reason why we had such an easy time getting pregnant.
I recommend women do it for at least 3 months prior to trying and think of it as a “premester” and like preparing the soil before you plant a garden. It’s the best way to prepare for an easy time conceiving, a healthy pregnancy, and healthy baby.
We can get pregnant easily in our late 30s and into our 40s, so please DON’T settle and DON’T succumb to external pressures out of fear for your fertility. But DO take your health and fertility into your own hands, there’s so much you can do to boost your fertility.